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Had I known this I would have
given up gluten years ago. #cellulite |
When we last left our intrepid heroine, she informed us that she had received the dual diagnosis of, "
You're old, and you have arthritis." We have been on pins and needles waiting to hear what she is going to do to combat that devastating combination!
Nora will stop referring to herself in the third person now.
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A pan of what we thought was gluten free lasagna.
That was before I discovered sausage does indeed
contain gluten. Dammit - so close to being gluten free!! |
After Dr. Wonderful told me I'm old and have arthritis, I asked about the possibility of a gluten sensitivity.
He said it was really not likely.
Hearing his opinion made me decide to try going gluten free for a month or so and see if there was any improvement.
I started at lunch last Saturday (had to do some shopping first!) and it really hasn't been too bad. It's a learning curve for me, however. Things I thought were gluten free are not, and I ate them in the last week so I guess I haven't been truly gluten FREE, more like gluten frugal.
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Part of my gluten-free lunch one day this week:
salad with honey-dijon dressing, and for dessert,
Annie's Vanilla & Cocoa Bunny Cookies and
chocolate covered pretzels. The other part was
the lasagna with gluten failure. |
So I've been doing lots of research and trying to sort out what I can and can't eat. It's been an education. Many soups have gluten in the broth. It's used a filler in all kinds of food so you really have to look at labels. I found tasty treats at Trader Joe's, and turns out there is an excellent GF store a few miles from our house. And Cub Foods has a surprisingly huge selection of GF foods! Also surprising - the cost of GF bread products. And some of the loaves could serve as effective door stops. Holy crap, I swear they weigh about 10 pounds, and so far, I haven't found a bread product that can be used to make a sandwich. If they're not toasted, they're pretty disgusting. I'm sure there's something out there that will work; the search will continue. But hear this: If my GF experiment works, I'm going to learn to make my own bread. I could go broke trying to satisfy my carb whore tendencies.
Even more crushing news: I found out that envelope glue contains gluten. (Stamps too!) Such a disappointment! First I had to come to grips with the fact that the occupation of "Hand Model" would never be listed on my resume. Now I have to give up the dream of appearing on "My Freaky/Disgusting/Attention-Seeking Habit" and showcasing my compulsion to lick 5000 envelopes a day???? This sucks!! I'm never going to be famous.
Annnnnyyyyywhoooo.....Allow me to say goodbye to a few of my gluten-filled friends I can no longer hang with:
- Oreos
- Gorgonzola cheese
- Grey Goose Vodka
- Oreos
- Cottage cheese
- Clif bars
- Chocolate Malt-O-Meal
- Oreos
- Boca burgers
- Steel cut oatmeal
- Did I mention Oreos?
But the friend to whom I most hate to say goodbye?
DON JULIO TEQUILA.
That's going to be a tough one. (If you've been reading this blog for any length of time, you know how much I adore my sippin' tequila.)
But I adore running even more so if this experiment works, it will be well worth it.